Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The hanging up controversy turned out to be a misunderstanding. What the fuck lah. It nearly put our friendship at stake. We’re in good terms now.. Well at least I think we are... Aren’t we? Ouh wells... Let’s get over this... No point sacrificing our friendship over small matter like this. =D

Just came back from my grandfather’s place. I have always looked forward to this gathering. It is the only time where every family member get together. It is in fact our tradition to go over at his place every night of Hari Raya eve. Everyone was there except for my brother. =.=''' He has his kompang thing. And there are good news. 2 of my aunts are expecting!! It's time to welcome the 2 new comers to Sahmat family. How cool. =D


Salam Aidilfitri to all my friends out there!!


I viewed Fiona’s blog and read. I forgot to check what my elective is. Wth.. So went to the NYP site and I got Marketing for the coming sem. I was hoping for Personal development because I find it easier to score. Damn. Let’s just hope I can pull it off.

I have this strong urge to be harsh and mean to this asshole but after so much thoughts, it is better to rant it in my blog rather than make chaos at his Friendster. Take a look at this.

For clearer view click on tHiS and scroll down to the testi section. I swear I want to puke my intestines out when I read this from this Fucker.

Memang lah kita sebagai manusia tidak lepas dari membuat kesilapan. Tetapi kita tidak seharusnya menjadikan ia sebagai alasan untuk kita membuat kesilapan yang sama. Ungkapan yang kau ucapkan sudah basi lah sey. Tolong jangan bebual world. Muak siol. Seandainya ludah ku ini jatuh ke muka kau, alangkah indahnya? And to the ex fiancé. Please lah. You’re the same as him. Same-same merepek. You two maybe older than me but it is a pity that your maturity rate is lower than a 12 year old kid. I’m ashamed.


In conclusion, I am sincerely disgusted by the two of you. Don’t you get it? Can’t you suckers just fuck off?? Dope. Live your own life and stop appearing in other people’s life. Ouh wait, who are you people again? Do I even know you? _I_


Yours sincerely,
ShImA

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 11:05 PM }


Monday, September 29, 2008

I am really fuck pissed by that rudeness. You just hanged up on me and threatened to not come on 7th and 8th if you don't like what you see?? what the fuck?! The worse thing is that YOU called me and then YOU just hang up the fucking phone. That is rudeness. And I cannot stand that. YOU don’t have to show that attitude of yours if you aren’t happy. eh siala. The motive of this mass dance thing is to have fun. Why are you behaving as if it is a big deal? Fuck uh. If YOU are reluctant to come for the camp because of this, let’s just forget about this whole mass dance thing. I’m SICK and TIRED having to constantly assure and persuade people who are too conservative. It is just a dance. You know what? I give up lah.
SHIMA
♥ disguised at { 9:26 PM }



I took the following du'a and poem on Ramadhan by an Ustaz from my cousin's blog.
It's a beautiful one.
I nearly cried.



Ya Allah, Engkau jadikan bulan Ramadhan yang Kau istimewakan ia, dari semua bulan
Kau pilih ia dari semua masa dan zaman
Kau lebihkan ia dari semua waktu-waktu dalam setahun
Dengan Ramadhan, Kau pilih kami
Kami berpuasa pada waktu siangnya, atas perintahMu
Dan kami dirikan solat malamnya, atas pertolonganMu
Untuk memperoleh pahala dan ampunan dariMu

Selama sebulan, Ramadhan berada di tengah-tengah kami
Namu kini Ramadhan akan meninggalkan kami
Pada akhir waktunya, pada hujung jangkanya, pada kesempurnaan bilangannya
Ya Ramadhan, betapa banyak orang yang terbebas di dalammu

Betapa bahagianya, orang yang menjaga kesucianmu
Engkaulah bulan, yang sejahtera segalanya, betapa kami akan selalu merinduimu

Ya Allah, kami pecinta Ramadhan
Dengannya telah kau muliakan kami
Dari lubuk hati kami, penyesalan paling dalam
Dari lidah kami, permohonan ma'af yang paling tulus
Anugerahilah kami pahala, dengan segala kekurangan kami
Memenuhi hakMu di bulan ini

Ya Allah, apa sahaja dosa besar dan dosa kecil
Yang kami lakukan di bulan ini, atau kesilapan yang kami langgar dengan sengaja
Atau kerana terlupa, atau kezaliman pada diri kami
Dan kezaliman kami terhadap orang lain
Tutuplah kami dengan ma'afMu
Terimalah kami dengan ampunanMu

Ya Allah, dengan berlepasnya bulan Ramadhan ini,
Lepaskan pula kami dari noda-noda kesalahan
Pastikan kami mendapat redhaMu

Pastikan kami memperoleh ampunan dan kasih sayangMu
Ya Arhamarrahimin

Indahnya hari-hari terjalin dalam naunganmu ya Ramadhan
Pada lapar dan dahaga kami temukan kesabaran
Bahagia menjelma bila saat berbuka tiba
Dan di sisiNya, pahala telah ditetapkan
Kesyahduan akrab bersemayam di hati
Sebening telaga Al-Kautsar, diperciki seberkas cahayaNya

Mutiara dan Marjan berbinar-binar
Segala puja dan du'a datang dan bergerak ke angkasa
Seputih merpati terbang beriringan
Menggapai singgahsanaNya, megah tak terbayangkan

Moga Ia menerima segala amal
Mencurahkan air kesejukan pada hati yang gementar, mengharap saat perjumpaan

Ku teguk manisnya setiap hening malam mu ya Ramadhan
Yang kami lebur dalam ruku' dan sujud kami, penuh kekhusyu'an
Mengalir pada setiap ayat Al-Quran yang dibaca di atas sejadah selebar hijau dedaunan,
Seluas birunya lautan
Tinggalkan semerbak wangi kasturimu di masjid-masjid dan di rumah-rumah kami


Wahai bulan Ramadhan
Biar hati kami yang singgah tetambat di dalamnya
Merekah iman dan amal yang berterusan
Kan kami untai hari-hari yang lewat, seolah kau tak beranjak,
Di sini berdekatan dan kisahkanlah indahnya Taman Firdaus,
Jelitanya para bidadari yang di atas dipan duduk bertelekan

Sampaikan salam rindu kami ya Ramadhan

Pada mereka, permata Jakut yang menanti

Menanti di pintu gerbang AR-Rayyan...


And I just found out something else from his blog too... check out the song he sang..

Nice right? I thought my voice is the nicest in the family.. HAHA! (yeah right.. jgn perasan... My voice isn't nice even. lawl.) I didn't know his voice are that good. Sorry for under-estimating..lolz. haha. But man... Your voice damn nice uh. You really sang with your heart and soul out that I can actually hear and feel how meaningful the song is, from your singing. I like the part when you 'tarik'.. (don't know the english term for that word... ) but really. omg. I'm not trying to judge or what.. it really does soothes the pair of ears. I'm beginning to love that song. =)

ShImA

Sesungguhnya.. Ramadhan tidak akan pergi meninggalkan dengan begitu pantas... dan dapat kita menikmati bulan yang mulia ini dengan rendah diri beserta menunaikan amalan dan ibadah penuh khusyuk dan keikhlasan dan juga memperolehi kesan yang amat mendalam. Masyaallah..
♥ disguised at { 3:22 AM }


Sunday, September 28, 2008

I had ice-cream and lime juice this morning before dawn.
And it is suppose to last till dusk.
I’m not sure if I or rather my body can take it or not... but..
ouh wells...

I know it’s kind of weird.. I’m looking for trouble perhaps...
It’s not my first time eating ice-cream early in the morning... but I think it is my first time eating it this early during fasting month... =)

Another 2 more days of fasting... and we have to bid farewell to Ramadhan. =’(
ShImA
♥ disguised at { 6:14 AM }


Friday, September 26, 2008

First and foremost...

THANKS
JAN
FOR PANGSE-ING!!
Lolz. We were hoping that you would turn up. Thx ehk. The worse thing is that YOU my dear friend, PROMISED that you will turn up. I turned down the idea of breaking fast at my grandfather’s place just to go Geylang you know... and of course to see you. lolz. I wonder.. When will be the day you will actually show up ehk? ouh wells.. I don’t care. YOU better make up for this pangse-ing case of yours. =)

Rodney, Me and Nunman took the 2nd last train back 2 Jurong East from Geylang... Rodney was slightly worried because he’s scared that the last train will not reach his place so he got down at City Hall and took the red line. He got the last train to Jurong. I was complaining to Nunman that my hair got this smoke smell and he agreed. I think I stand at the area where there’s a lot BBQ smoke or whatever you call that for too long. LoL. He was advising me not to smell it when I’m alone because it seemed like I’m admiring my hair and it seems wrong. LOL. thanks ehk. I got a slight headache lah. Aiyo..

Reached home at 12+...

Tomorrow will be heading to school for a jog. Guess what time I suggested to Carol? 9 am in school. LOL. confident.. we’ll see uh.. Hopefully.. I will be awake later. The reason behind that timing was because I will be busy from afternoon onwards with housework, spring cleaning and all plus the baking of cookies. Don’t know can take it or not lah. And my loveliest KUKU Carol.. you better appreciate it. I’m going for a jog in the morning, in school, for your sake. Haha. =DD



You are The Empress


Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.


The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents,
beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home
decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.


The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.


What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.



ShImA
♥ disguised at { 3:16 AM }


Thursday, September 25, 2008

I was ½ an hr late for my meeting and I was supposed to chair it with Rodney. So much for reminding the rest for not being late, and in the end, I’m the one who’s late. Ashrof called and then teased me. Everyone was there already, seated, waiting for me. I have high hopes in making the camp a successful one and the most memorable camp they’ve attended. I will make sure those who didn’t want to attend this camp regret not attending. But I shall not put high hopes because I may end up disappointed. The meeting lasted for 2 hours.

I just had to fake it, pretend to say that it is ok for a couple of times, so that it won’t hurt the other party when it is actually not ok. I am always having this internal conflict. I tend to please others but myself. And I tend to contradict.

Anyways, I met Azrun at BB. It’s the 2nd time we met after secondary. I got shocked the first time I met him because he was way taller than me. He was the one who noticed me first in the KFC at JEC. I still remember how we used to compare our heights back then in secondary school. We went Swensens to break fast. He commented on a lot of things. And then we watched Mirror. Mirror was way too gore for me. I don’t really enjoy watching this type of movie. Thanks to me for choosing that in the first place. Serves me right. I actually liked the storyline despite having to watch all the gory scenes. By the way today’s ’mini’ date was his treat.

I enjoyed myself. Since he’s more on the friendlier side, he did most of the talking. We shared a lot about our lives. And I got to know some of his secrets. Darn. It was hilarious.

I had great time with you. Thanks for everything. =)

I’m exhausted. I feel reluctant to go for archery later. Ouh wells.. we’ll see. After that, we will be heading to Geylang Serai. =)) As requested by Hafiz but he will be there later as he got his F1 job briefing. And most importantly, we get to meet Jan!! It’s been months since we saw him. I miss all his crappy jokes and sarcasm and the teasing and his wittiness. Man, I miss him.

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 2:20 AM }


Wednesday, September 24, 2008

I decided to go for a late night jog 2 days back and then head down to my mom’s workplace. When I’m done with jogging, my legs were shaky and there was a slight pain. And I felt exhausted. But I was satisfied to have that much stamina despite of neglecting it for quite a few months. I’m now motivated to do more of that to stop my bad sleeping routines and get back in shape. =D

Yesterday, Head to school to give archery a shot. It was instructed by my dear friend Rodney. Man it was fun!! But it’s a little tiring. Rodney was early. He had set up the equipments and all...well most of it before we arrived, alone. Come to think of it, the setting up of the bow wasn’t that easy you know....He did it alone. I thought we, Priya and me, were already late because he reminded us not to be late but Teddy and Hafiz haven’t even reach. While waiting, Rodney gave us some basics of archery and we learned to dismantle the string from the bow.

When Teddy was walking towards us, I swear, me and Priya couldn’t even recognise him. He looked so different without his specs and with the cap. He looked younger and much better. I told him that he looked like a typical studious type with his specs.
I think Teddy, you just come school like that and you should throw away your specs already. =D

Rodney and Teddy set up the board. Me and Priya could only afford to just look at them set up the board. Then, we try out. The feeling of releasing the string and watch the arrow cut across the air and finally piercing onto the board was damn syiok. All of us had our turns. And then finally, Hafiz came.

In the midst of it, I told Hafiz what I had observed, which is supposed to be kept among us, sisters and brothers. He was denying at first but in the end what I guessed was right. =D Anyways lets drop the topic before I reveal everyting. There were lots of teasing, laughter, cheering, joking around and sharing sessions. And that Teddy said I grew fatter. Blardy arse. He just had to say that. Evil. But I somehow had to agree with him. LOL. And it's time to watch my diet because I don't want to be growing side ways.

We wrap up at 6+. Rodney dismantled the equipments. By the time he’s done, it was already 7+ and then we head to Mac because me and Hafiz had to break our fast. When we’re done eating, we stayed longer. There was a lot of sharing. It was the five of us again. It has always been. Ever since our BME meeting then study break and till now, we’ve been together and much closer. I’m going to cherish it because there might not be any of these in months to come. Thanks to BME connect, our friendship grew stronger each day. I really hoped that we will stay this way.

And this reminds me of the bond me, Hafiz and Rodney had. The bond we had and still have was amazing. It has always been the 3 of us since the beginning of the year 2, first semester. It has rather became an SOP. There were lots of wonderful moments. I cherish every single one of them. Be it from all those hiking, pool outings, hang out sessions and study sessions. And they were the only people who came to support me when I went for my competition. They were there when I needed them. And not forgetting all those teasing coming out from their respective mouth. They were awesome. I love them.


We went off at 9+.


I’m so tired right now.
There's meeting later.
And I hate it when people aren't committed,
Who gave up and then back out last minute,
Leaving everything to us.
You're not the only one who's busy.
Come on larh... We weren't asking for much.
You just have to bear with it for a few weeks more.
And then you can go fly kite for all I care.




ShImA
Friendship last longer when we think alike.
♥ disguised at { 2:26 AM }


Monday, September 22, 2008

I knew there was something different about yesterday’s night.
Incomparable to any other nights.
It was rather special.

Stood by the window, with eyes closed, breathing the fresh and cool air, relishing the delectation. It was ...

The atmosphere I’ve been craving for.
The ambience I thirst for.
The breeze I longed for.

Soothe the souls who cease sleeping.
Worth the sacrifice.



ShImA

♥ disguised at { 10:26 PM }



Finally I met up with An, Gunan and Nana. Btw peepz, Salleh was supposed to be there but he couldn’t make it. They fetched me since I was late. We chilled by the roadside near MI. We decided to sit on the concrete divider or whatever you call that. And Nana came up with Mice Incubator(MI). We realised there were rats all over the pathway. Haha.
Ouh wells...They did most of the talking, crapping, horniness, teasing and what not. They’re fun bunch of people. According to An, it’s been 9 months since we last seen each other. I hope there will not be an every-9-month-meet habit/system. Lolz.

Anyways, Gunan recommended watching this Achmed The Terrorist video. And I decided to watch it when I reached home. Damn. It was friggin’ hilarious. I literally ROFL and LOL-ing my ass throughout the video. You guys should watch it. =D



ShImA
♥ disguised at { 12:18 AM }


Sunday, September 21, 2008

Today marks the last 10 days of ramadhan.(thx 2 cuz who corrected me.) A period, I call, auspicious. In a blink, it is already the 20th day of the fasting month and soon, we have to bid goodbye to Ramadhan and welcome Syawal, aka Hari Raya. =)

Ramadhan makes you a stronger person from within. All those sacrifices made, having more patience with the surroundings and people, being more pious and of course the fasting from dawn till dusk. That’s the reason why Ramadhan is one of the most looked forward months for the Muslim community. And I’m emphasizing on Muslim here as not all Malay community are Muslims. I’m not trying hard to be or sound all pious because I don’t consider myself as one. There are true Muslims out there who really know their stuffs. And I’m amazed by their down-to-earth personality that they possess and how diverse they can be. An example, if I may, Asyraf is one of them. I’m just an average Muslim, sharing my thoughts. It won’t do any harm either as long as you have a clear conscious of what you’re trying to spread across.

Anyways,
As I was blog-hopping, I saw this and it caught my eye. I just adore this kind of things. =)


•N: loves to laugh and smile
•O: has one of the best personalities ever
•O: has one of the best personalities ever
•R: funny
•A: hot
•S: makes people laugh
•H: is really sweet
•I: stick to one
•M: makes dating fun

•A: hot
•H: is really sweet


(All of them is true... well..at least I think it is. *insert cheeky smile*)
You guys can give it a try and see it your name fits you. =)

•A: hot
•B: loves people
•C: good kisser
•D: can kick your butt
•E: has gorgeous eyes
•F: loves people wild and crazy adore you
•G: very outgoing
•H: is really sweet
•I: stick to one
•J: is very sexual
•K: crazy
•L: is a very good kisser
•M: makes dating fun
•N: loves to laugh and smile
•O: has one of the best personalities ever
•P: popular with all types of people
•Q: a hypocrite
•R: funny

•S: makes people laugh
•T: a smile to die for
•U: is loved by everyone
•V: not judgmental
•W: very broad minded
•X: never let people tell you what to do
•Y: is loved by everyone
•Z: can be funny and dumb at times

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 8:00 AM }


Saturday, September 20, 2008


Something abstract brings endless theories.
Unsupported theories give rise to misinterpret inferences.
Unfavorable inferences lead to negative judgements.
Baseless judgements carry wrong assumptions.


Everything should be analysed thoroughly beforehand because assumptions made are set to kill.
It is unbearably intolerant.
ShImA
♥ disguised at { 6:17 AM }


Thursday, September 18, 2008

),: i hate being defeated. =,(
ShImA
♥ disguised at { 1:05 AM }


Wednesday, September 17, 2008

To My Dearest Cuz; SiTi NuR HiDaYaH,

Heyz!! Cheer up yea...=)) you HAVE to either maintain that GPA of yours or get an even better GPA the next time round. Don’t let others demoralise you. You know yourself better. And you’re right. They can’t compare your grades/scores with anyone who’s not in the same course because you’re doing completely different thing. There are no such things as other courses are easier than yours or vice versa. They got to go through what you’ve gone through in order to compare. Just ignore what they have to say because they weren’t the one experiencing it. From what I see, you’re consistent with your work. Poly is all about consistency.


I find myself encouraging others more than myself.


I went Redhill to play street soccer. Hafiz didn’t join us. He bubble-d last minute. I was the first to reach. A big YAY to me! There were me, Rodney, Shafiq, Nunman and 7 of his friends. Ameera came to watch us play. She was from school. I was the only girl playing. An SOP I think. I was fasting btw. It was fun despite the fact that I got hit by the soccer ball for 3 times. Leg, chest and head. How awesome?? The impact was a hard one uh by the way. They really whack the ball. But I didn’t careless. Who ask me to stand in front of the guy who’s kicking the ball? It wasn’t as horrendous as getting hit right on the face like what Teddy did to me. Getting hit by the soccer ball was a normal thing. I got hit EVERYTIME I played soccer. It was supposed to be a rough game I guess. Guys playing... standard. But man.... they were good soccer players especially that Dennis.

Nunman’s ex sec mates were gays la... literally. OMG. But they were a fun bunch of gays. We stopped playing at 7+ and head to Queensway’s KFC to have our dinner. While waiting for Dennis and this other guy, we played Bluff. Played a few rounds.

Stopped for a while to have our dinner. Nunman’s cliques really take their own sweet time to finish up their food. Worse than girl. And that explains Nunman’s eating habit. No offense. Hahaha. And they were all soccer freaks. OMG. Haha. Rodney and I finished our food before them. When they were done eating, we continued with our bluff game. I had fun. There were lots of hilarious and sarcasm moments. We laughed a lot too. And I got the Ace of spades for 3 or 4 consecutive times. Lucky or what?! Hahaz. =DD Played till 10+ going 11. We walked to Queensway station. It was drizzling slightly.

Benjamin took the train back with me and Rod. Rodney was giving me tips for next sem. I'm grateful to have a friend like him. =)


ShImA
♥ disguised at { 1:30 AM }


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My results were depressing. From 1C to 4Cs. N my GPA drop.


As you can see.. previous semesters, there were a lot of As and Bs, but this sem, I could only afford Bs n Cs. Ouh wells.. Luckily no D. Thx to carol 4 e encouragement n e faiths that I cried. Too touched.

Let’s look at the bright side. Thanks to my friends who ‘picked’ me up when I fell. I was on the verge of giving up then. Thanks to all the encouragements from the cliques and the sarcasm as well. Teddy and Rodney.. without them, I’ll flunk the modules and have to repeat it. They were there when I wasn’t at my best. They tried to help me out and I’m glad they did successfully. =D
The results were better than the tests I did..I went all the way fyi. I was supposed to flunk my biosensors and math badly. But thank god I didn’t. ANP and Cost a/c went the flip side. I was scoring Distinctions n As... and I got C for my finals. I gave up Cost a/c totally.

Ouh wells.. It is still not too late to try harder the next time round. I seriously don’t deserve this. I’m not bragging but it’s a fact. It wasn’t suppose to be this tough. It was within my capabilities. I know I can do so much better if my bad sleeping habits and attitude and behaviour didn’t get in the way.

ShImA
When there’s a will, there’s definitely a way.
♥ disguised at { 2:46 AM }



I don’t have the courage to go and see my result. It’s too nerve-wrecking. The possibility of me being disappointed is high. OMG. Is this the sign of the beginning of failure?

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 12:04 AM }


Saturday, September 13, 2008

The route I chose blindly is the path I randomly picked.
This is the path which will eat me up eventually.
Knowing that I am not going to devote myself to it, sends me regrets.

I should be proud. There are people out there who are still struggling to get to my spot. Maybe I was lucky enough to be where I am now. But what if this random path I took is really not for me? I’m just wasting my time doing something I don’t really like when I can actually do something else which I could fully devote my entire soul to it. Having this rationale of ‘just go with the flow’ has killed part of me. I’m regretting it.

The path I’ve chosen consist of people who have conservative mindset. Maybe I should blame those leadership camps I went, for spoiling me. Things are so much different then. I’m not trying to brag but those people I met during those camps back then were way sporting and full of enthusiasm. Maybe it’s because we’re all leaders and dare to take challenges and willing to risk ourselves by trying something different. Now, majority are relying too much on their comfort zones that they chicken out when they’re asked to do something different. Maybe I’m wrong... There’s more conservative and reserved bunch now. And it frustrates me.

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 1:20 AM }


Thursday, September 11, 2008

Moved by the melodies.
Soothed by the voice.
Touched by the lyrics.
Soften the soul.
Sends tears to the eyes.
ShImA
♥ disguised at { 2:06 AM }


Monday, September 8, 2008

I was early today. Hafiz was late. Rodney and Priya were expecting me to come at 5pm. Lolz. Evil. Although it used to be my routine, to be 1 hr late... but that was all in the past. =)) Once I reached the station, while waiting for that sister, Rodney bombarded my with brain teasers. =)

Hafiz portrayed a shock expression when he saw me. As always, he’s constantly underestimate me. Let us put that aside. We head to the fair price to buy our stuffs for the camp. Teddy decided to drop by after his poly forum thingy. Faiz, Hafiz’ friend was also there. Omg. He reminded me of the ‘hair boy’. Inside joke.

While waiting for the things to be packed, there was this mad guy who just appeared from nowhere, made annoyingly weird and idiotic reactions and facial expressions to me and fiz. His main target was me. 3 times people. For 3 blardy times he was giving me all those stupid and nonsensical facial expressions. I got irritated and pissed off that I cursed and swear on the spot. I just couldn’t refrain my temper. I was already on the verge of landing my fist to that mad man’s face. If only.. If only I took that chance, I wouldn’t be feeling this way now. Blame this mad man for making me despise all mad people.

Let’s drop the topic before I became paranoid. We head to the popular at Jubilee to buy stationaries. Hafiz and Rodney ended up bringing home all the things. Ouh wells... I can’t wait for the camp!! =DD

I’m aware that I’m all emotional and sensitive today.
Luckily this guy who worked at Alif apologised. If not, today will be the last day he sees me, eating at Alif. I swear I won’t set my foot there because of his sarcasm. Perhaps I’m taking small things too seriously.
Anyways, there’s this worker who looked like Ashrof, my course mate. I think I should bring him there to witness his resemblance with the worker. And I think it’s a good idea. Hahaz.

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 11:31 PM }


Sunday, September 7, 2008

I was lethargic to even wake up when it was already 2pm. Sms-ed Teddy and Priya that I will be heading to the library at 4pm confidently. BUT... 5pm then I went out from my house. I tricked Priya before I went out and she fell for it. She screamed over the phone. Yea.. I’m being evil. Ouh wells.

I dragged them along with me to go to the library and read book. I’m such a nice friend. =DD But I don’t consider myself as a bookworm coz I don’t actually read. I tend to get bored easily. It seems like I’m contradicting myself aye?? Ouh wells..

Priya had to go off first. Me and Teddy left till the library close.


And some random guy just finished talking to me over the phone. Thanks to my sis for passing her hp to me and asked me to entertain him. And we talked for over an hour. He sounds like a nice guy. Lolz. Ok shima.. cut the topic.

Anyways... will be heading to AMK tomorrow to buy the things for the camp with Rod, Priya and Fiz...

ShImA


♥ disguised at { 10:20 PM }


Saturday, September 6, 2008

I’ve yet to prove those desires.
It’s going to be the end of the 1st week of Ramadhan and I swear my daily routines were either the same or are getting worse. I can assure you that I’ve wasted my first week of Ramadhan. Now that I can’t fast for the next few days, I’m left with 2 weeks plus to really make sure that Ramadhan don’t go wasted. It’s easier said than done. Somehow, I didn’t feel the change in atmosphere like I used to, during my previous Ramadhan. Probably I didn’t do enough. What am I saying. I barely start doing anything this fasting month. I’ve yet to go to the mosque and perform the terawih. I’ve yet to pray sincerely with all the prayer readings properly read. I’ve yet to read the Quran. I’ve yet to stop the usage of vulgarities this ramadhan. I’ve yet to have more patience. There’s still a LONG list. There’s SO MANY “I’ve yet...” and I’m still wondering when it will actually be done. Ouh wells. At least I know that I get to fast during the Lailatul qadar, the last 10 nights of Ramadhan. Anyways, no point regretting what has passed. I want to make full use of the remaining days of this month as it only comes once a year. Ramadhan is the most blessed month.

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 8:32 PM }


Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I’m choleric. Something provoked me just now and I blurted out all the vulgarities aloud in the middle of the night with so much angst. I was extremely crossed. It just got to my nerve and I can’t control my temper any longer. I portrayed this other side of me which NONE have witnessed. Patience is what I lack of. It may be contradicting to some. The truth is that I have low boiling point.

Life is all about being bias. Favouritism is what I hate. Jealousy or envy may be the root cause. We overlooked someone’s actual character or attribute by the physical attraction or features they possess which I find it hard to accept. It sets me to ponder which I find extremely disturbing. These negative thoughts I have will somehow find its way to demoralise me even further and crush my self-esteem.. I detest fakers.



ShImA
Is still struggling.
Struggling to cleanse her soul.
♥ disguised at { 3:35 AM }


Monday, September 1, 2008

Warning: A long entry.

Yesterday’s performance turned out great despite undergoing some drama. We were on the verge of backing out. I was pissed off and disappointed by the attitude of some of my crew members actually. Maybe they weren’t mature enough. All of them are two years younger than me. I just cannot understand why we’re so concerned about what people will think about us and being all pessimistic about things that have yet to happen. If you have the passion to dance you’ll do whatever it takes to get there without having the slightest doubt and leaving all those negative thoughts behind and don’t give a damn about what people will say. Thanks to those who stood by us, those who urge us to just give it a try, even though they were strangers to us, after all it is the experience that counts. I’m amazed by the support they gave especially this guy from LNT.

Ouh wells. There were a lot of people cheering for us despite of the cocked up song. Those motivations, cheers and encouragement from the crowd who want us to continue even without the music, left a great impact. It is really a scene to remember.

I was disappointed with the attitude of my sis during the practice we had. She asked me to join them for this competition and I agreed as they were short of manpower. She was portraying this ugly attitude of hers which I find disturbing and I actually regretted becoming part of the crew.. She asked her friends to teach me. Well, I’m fine with it. No biggie. They taught me well but incomplete. Later on, I noticed that my sis was actually reluctant to coach me with the whole dance routine. She repeatedly uttered this statement throughout our practicing days, “You teach her. I don’t want to teach. I’m tired.” I decided to let that suspicion go by making my own excuses in my mind that, maybe she’s just exhausted. I got pissed off by her remarks but I remained silent. Assumptions shouldn’t be made as they are bound to deceive. But then later, I realised my stand was right. Mind you, I ONLY had 3 days of practice and the routines taught weren’t even complete until that sat midnight.We don’t even have group practice. Everyone’s busy with their own thing. She didn’t even bother to let me know of the details of the practice until I sms-ed her. She was even reluctant to even tell me what we will be wearing on the day itself. She ignored when I asked the first time. I didn’t care less. I asked her again on the last day of practice and here’s what she replied, “I don’t know.” I was irritated but I kept it low. And I asked her another time when we’re about to head home and she said, “That one later can prepare. “. I got frustrated and I kept a distance away from her to prevent myself from getting out of control. That very morning, then she told me what we were supposed to be wearing. I raised my voice but at the same time restricting my temper from getting out of hand. I hate it when the essential information was being told last minute. I hate this attitude of hers. I had to call Hafiz and Rodney up to bring what is needed.
I'm not trying to bad-mouth. somethings are just unbearable and i need to express myself.
Why is it that I feel very inferior even though im the eldest??
i hate orders from the young ones because it affect my dignity.

Anyhoos, I want to thank those who actually came to support. After the whole event, I went off with Hafiz and Rodney and we head for pool at LP. =DD It has been very long time since we set our foot at that place. Luck was on my side. After that we head home. I slept throughout the long journey back home.

Today is already the first day of the fasting month. Time flies. It seemed that we had barely begun our year and it’s already September. Tight and busy schedules might be the cause of it. Anyways, I really hoped that all my bad behaviours that I committed before will be stopped during this holy month of Ramadhan. For over one billion Muslims throughout the world, Ramadhan is a special month of the year. During the month of Ramadhan, Muslims fast from dawn to sunset every day. It is a time for inner reflection, devotion to God and self-control. This is the month where we Muslims cleanse our souls and minds.

My bad habits have to stop. Who knows you’ll witness a new me after this fasting month??Being a better Muslim is my aim. God willing. Everything has to be kept low and controlled to respect this month and I hope to do more good deeds. Somehow the atmosphere now is different. Ouh wells. I want to read up the Quran which I left it untouched for almost a year. I said I want to actually read it but performing it is another question, procrastination is what I’m suffering from. I love fasting month. Not because Hari Raya is coming, but the benefits we attained from it.

To aLL mUsLiMs 0uT tHeRe:
SeLaMaT MeNuNaIkAn IbAdAh pUaSa.
SeMoGa kITa dApAt TeMpuHi SeGaLa CaBaRaN dAn DugAaN yAnG dIbErIkAn dEnGaN taBah dAn SeM0gA kItA dApAt mEnJaLaNi iBadAH pUaSa dEnGan pEnUh KeSabaRan dAn KeCeKaLan dI bULan yAnG pEnUh BaRakAh iNi.

ShImA
♥ disguised at { 2:54 AM }



the unique one

23mAy1990
fAcEb0ok
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*



Living life to the fullest
Is when you can go with the flow
Knowing that the journey
May not be smooth
But there are no challenges
Too tough you can't overcome

Complications are parts and parcels of life


Treasured Friendship
Friendship is all about putting in effort.
As long as we do our part
Friendship will stay blissful.
Friendship will never go without arguments and disagreements.
Showing care and concern,
Isn’t only about throwing words all around,
But portraying it.
Some may be good with words
But it is the action that matters.


Cloud Nine
Whenever the thoughts of you
Lingers in my mind,
I grew restless.
The urge to see you grew stronger.
Even if it's only for a short while.
Whenever I picture you in my mind,
A smile is drawn across my face.
Whenever I imagine you in my mind,
I sensed butterflies in my stomach.
Whenever I think of you,
Exuberance strikes.
Whenever I dreamt of you,
It eased the soul of mine.
Whenever I saw you,
Satisfaction is what I felt.


Her Love Story
My addiction to you
Grew stronger each day.
A day without you,
Rips off a portion of my sanity.
I see the sparkle in your eyes.
I feel the warmth in your smile.
I sense the truth in your words.
I believe the sincerity in you.
What more could I possibly ask for.
The heart doesn’t lie.
Its mind boggling that it turns out this way.
Coz all I want is you.
Missing you can turn from torture to pleasure
Only if you're missing me too...


Opposite Attraction.
You’re the one I was hoping for.
The fantasies I made up.
That I thought I could just dream upon.
Knowing my chances are slim.
Yet, silently I craved for you.
Then out of the blue
You appeared to fulfil the wildest dream of mine.
You’re the cause of my sleepless night,
The reasons for all the anticipation.
The thoughts of you lingering in my mind
Sends butterflies in my stomach
A smile across my face
And the happiness to my soul.
Simply IRRESISTIBLE.





*~*dUdEtTez*~*
Aida Alena AmALinA AmeErA CeLiNe ♥CiK iKa DidIe Fi0nA FiZa GeNgBeE GeRmAiNe HaIzA HiDaYaH hUmAiRaH KhALiLah KhALidAh KiNaH JuLyHa LiNg HuI L0uIsuRe MiC MiChELLe MiN HuI NaNa QiM QuRaIsHiA RaHmAh SaLLy ShAhIdAh ♥SiS ♥SiTicUz
*~*dUdeZ*~*
AnDy AmEeR ApEz AsYraF ♥AzMicUz BeRnArD FiRdAuS HaFiZ KhAz MarK NiChoLas NuNmAn SaM SkY TeDdY
*~*oTheRz*~*
BmEc0nNecT
SEG


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